Some expressive language by Teach!
A few weeks ago we had to shift all of our stuff on a Wednesday to Room 9. Then we had to put every thing away where it would fit and look right. We had to shift because our classroom is being rebuilt. It's going to be bigger and better!
The next day the class still wasn't right though. We were squeezed in because there wasn't much room. We were packed like a tin of sardines! By Thurday everything finally had somewhere to go.
On Friday Room11 was totally empty and looking a little lonely with nobody and nothing to keep it company. The classroom was finally ready to be built bigger and better, and on Monday the builders were ready to start building. We have been hearing all of the men working. Hammers, drills, and who knows what, have been making all sorts of noises from the first bell in the morning to the last bell in the afternoon.
We look through the fence at the builders while they work. We will not be back in our class for a while!xxxxx
I hope you don't mind Zivana but I've added some expressive language (and hopefully even more interest for the reader).
Simile
"We were packed like a tin of sardines!" - very squashed.
Hyperbole
"...from the first bell in the morning to the last bell in the afternoon."
- exaggerating how much noise there is and how long the noise lasts.
Alliteration
"...bigger and better!" - 2 'B' sounds.
"...built bigger and better..." - 3 'B' sounds.
"...looking a little lonely..." 3 'L' sounds.
Personification
"Room11 was totally empty and looking a little lonely..."
- Giving the classroom feelings like a person has.
2012
Great work you two. The collaboration makes for an excellent read. I noticed the personification on the first read (yes, I often read through more than once).
ReplyDelete