This is Room 11's blog (class of 2012). 11Online/2012 gives us a chance to write for an actual audience (reality writing). The main goal is to improve our writing over the year. We will continue to proof read, edit and improve our posts even after they have been posted.
If you want to read more about who we are, our blog goals, and our school, check out our blog page 'About Us'.
Music is a fantastic sound that you can listen to & lots of drift sounds & beats so that's why Lillee & Maia LOVE music . Lillee dad is a DJ so Lillee loves music.& Maia plays the ukulele that's why we LOVE music
by Lillee & Maia
Good effort writing for the reader's understanding ladies!. First, your spelling is spot on. 'Making sense' and punctuation is fairly good too but does need some editting.
The introduction tells us what you like and a little bit about why. I would love to see a paragraph from Lillee talking in detail about her favourite thing about music and a paragraph from Maia talking about the ukulele in detail. This would add more interest for the reader.
Good work girls. You tell me what you like, and why you like it.
ReplyDeleteGood effort writing for the reader's understanding ladies!. First, your spelling is spot on. 'Making sense' and punctuation is fairly good too but does need some editting.
ReplyDeleteThe introduction tells us what you like and a little bit about why. I would love to see a paragraph from Lillee talking in detail about her favourite thing about music and a paragraph from Maia talking about the ukulele in detail. This would add more interest for the reader.
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